As a spiritual learner, I always wondered: “Does surrendering mean to win, or to lose?” Multiple times, I have found myself confronted between believing most of society, which tells me that surrendering is losing, and my mother, who tells me “Letting go of your stress and surrendering to God will give you true freedom and relief–a win second to none.” On one hand, the idea seems simple, but in reality, the equation of figuring out whether surrender is victory or defeat is far more complex than you might think.
Surrender can mean a number of differing things in the worldly context. One example that commonly comes to mind is the meaning of surrender in the system of law and order. If someone is on the run from legal authority, after committing a crime, for instance, and they turn themselves in or they give up resistance to arrest, then they are surrendering to the authorities.
Historically, surrender has been seen countless times, including in the endings of wars. Let’s look at an example. World War II had many battles end in surrender, and itself ended in surrender. After Hitler succumbed himself to his oppression and took his own life, World War II ended in the unconditional surrender of Germany. In a worldly context, the qualities associated with surrender are “giving up”, or making the winning party more powerful than the party who surrenders. To put this point into perspective, let’s revisit World War 2. In surrendering, Germany gave up some of the power that they were fighting for, in turn making other countries more powerful than them.
Personally, I have had countless personal experiences in which I had to surrender. One prominent example I can think of was a couple of months ago. I had gotten a B in a class despite me putting in the greatest amount of effort I possibly could put into the class, and I associate this with surrender because I gave up the power that earning an A in the class would have given me, and the teacher of the class gained power over me. This experience made me feel like less than I was before earning this foul grade, and, ultimately, made me feel bad. It made me feel like I was in a competition with the teacher to earn back my power.
Surrender in the spiritual sense can also mean a number of different things. What commonly comes to mind when discussing the topic of spiritual surrender is the act of surrendering to God. What this can mean for many people is to let go of material desires and their stressors, even for a moment, and to place all their focus on God. When we surrender, we escape the worldly atmosphere, and enter a spiritual atmosphere, in which we lose all worry and tension. How and why does focusing on God help us to lose all worry and tension?
Essentially, when we surrender and focus on God, we allow Him–who is all-knowing, ubiquitous, and omnipotent–to direct our lives and our actions. Once we place such a faith in God, we often stop blaming ourselves for things that happen in our lives, and we live in the mentality that everything happens by God’s will, and that as long as we fulfill our duties and be our best, there is nothing else that is really up to us, or our burden to carry.
When I was first taught this concept, it was challenging for me to grasp, and the analogy I used was that of driving vs. taking a taxi. When you are driving, you are in control of how you get to your destination, but with this control comes many added stressors, including having to stay under the speed limit, not drive recklessly and get into an accident, etc. When you take a taxi, you still end up at your destination, but the driver takes you there, so you do not have to take on the stress of driving. So, when we surrender to God, it is like taking the taxi in life, placing faith on God as the driver.
There is both a complex, and a powerful relationship between surrender and faith. Those who surrender spiritually also tend to have a strong faith, because their trust in God and in spirituality enables them to let go of their stressors and worldly desires, and submit themselves to God. Faith leads to surrender, and surrender leads to faith. The relationship between Gyan and surrender is a mutual one similar to that of surrender and faith. Those who have Gyan, and understand God/spirituality are more likely to surrender, and those who surrender are more likely to have and/or understand Gyan.
Historically, examples of surrender in spirituality have been seen and practiced countless times. For example, in Hinduism, there is “Bhakti”, or loving devotion to God. In this powerful example, a devotee can sometimes practice such a level of Bhakti–where he/she places much faith and devotion in God–that they surrender to desire as we know it, and they don’t view their relationship with God as being centered around their desire, but rather as centered around “letting go,” or surrendering will, desire, and control over their own ambitions and responsibilities, and rather simply fulfilling God’s will. Another example is seen with Muslims, who follow Islam by surrendering their own faith and their will to God, in following the five main Pillars of Islam.
Last, but certainly not least, we can take the Sant Nirankari Mission as an example. All of its past Satgurus have demonstrated surrender to Nirankar (God). To put this example into perspective, let’s explore the example of Baba Hardev Singh Ji Maharaj’s leadership, and more specifically, His response to the assassination of His father. Most leaders are egotistical by nature, and take advantage of their power. Baba Hardev Singh Ji was much different in that he was always inclusive of everyone and made everyone feel important. He was so dedicated to this nature of being kind to everyone and living in unity that he spread a quote “It’s nice to be important, but it is more important to be nice.” When his own father was assassinated, he refrained from any violence and hatred. Instead, he preached forgiveness. So, by letting go of any power that He may have been entitled to, and instead living a life dedicated to God, unity, and kindness, he demonstrated and spread surrender in spirituality.
While we “give up” certain things when we practice true surrender, it liberates us completely. It is a paradox. We “give up” but yet we win. While true surrender takes away our natural tendency of living life for our own egotistical benefit, and without unselfish regard for others, or our ownership of ego and selfishness, it gives us the freedom of living life stress-free, and the freedom of living a life of enlightenment with unconditional regard for those around us.
How is worldly surrender different from spiritual surrender? How are they the same? First of all, they are evidently different in the sense that worldly surrender is looked at as a loss of power or control, and is usually a negative thing which is despised. Spiritual surrender, on the other hand, is gaining bliss and living life in enlightenment in the name of God, and is normally something that is desired, and looked at positively, especially by those who have God knowledge. While most shy away from worldly surrender, spiritual surrender is a privilege––something that is so rare to see that it is almost a well-kept secret––and can be thought of as the epitome of one’s spiritual journey.
If the 2 are obviously very different, seeing as their desirability levels are polar opposites, how are they the same? First, they both exhibit a loss of control. While in worldly surrender, this is a loss of desired power, in spiritual surrender, this is increased faith in God’s control, and a loss of the sense of human control over all happenings. Second, they are both hard to–and require effort to–achieve. Most people fight for their power before they give it up, whether this be in political races, war, or even in trying to land a spot in a remarkably competitive college. Similarly, most people try every possible way to control every single thing that happens in their life, before they decide that it is much wiser to surrender to God. The only real difference is that surrender hurts when done in the worldly context, while it heals powerfully in the spiritual context.
Once we explore the ins and the outs of surrender in both the worldly, as well as in the spiritual context, we can come to the conclusion that surrender in the worldly context is defeat, while surrender in the spiritual context rises up above the dichotomy of victory and defeat. Since power and Ego dominate our world in this day and age, losing power hurts most people’s Ego, and as a result, they feel defeated when they surrender. Spiritual surrender, on the other hand, is above victory and defeat. It is true that we lose a lot of the things that we are better without, such as our Ego, and our materialistic desire. It is also true that we gain a lot of things from surrendering to God, such as having His hand directing all our paths. However, when we truly surrender to God, “Victory” and “Defeat” become meaningless. Why? Because both victory and defeat affect our Egos, and spiritual surrender allows us to give up Ego. Our souls rise above these worldly concepts and rest in true bliss, where both victory and defeat simply cease to exist.
